…from your Pastor’s Desk
It is safe to say that for many of you who are reading this, both parents are deceased.
My father died in 1997 – I was 42. My mother in 2009 – I was 54. Not a child by a long shot, but one of my friends said to me at my mom’s funeral, ‘So, how does it feel to be an orphan?’ I did not think of it that way, but it did make me pause and reflect. Yes, many of us had that same experience, and many others have at very young ages due to tragic circumstances. It is rough. The two people that probably offered you unconditional love more than anyone else, are now gone. What wonderful soothing words Jesus speaks to his disciples: I will not leave you orphans. I won’t let you down, I won’t go away never to return. No, I will be with you.
Thus, we move forward in our consideration of the Easter Mystery. We move from the contemplation of Christ’s appearances after the resurrection, as we heard over the last few Sundays, to a meditation on the continued presence of Christ in the Church through the Holy Spirit. That same Spirit with us right now, right here.
No, we have not been left orphans, we have the Holy Spirit, the continued presence of Christ, in our midst, leading, guiding and inspiring us. Jesus said of the Spirit: “…You know him, because he remains with you, and will be in you…” These are the words of Jesus in today’s Gospel. They are words we should take seriously.
But we don’t always feel that God, through the Spirit, is in us. I know. Some people feel as though they have no contact with the Holy Spirit, that it is something for others; they feel just like spiritual orphans. Going to church and praying seems like just going through the motions. But most who do will say it wasn’t always like that…
They were taught the catechism and received their First Holy Communion and Confirmation at the appropriate times and, at times in their youth felt very religious and pious and holy. Then…. things happened, or maybe DIDN’T happen…and things changed. Things, even Sacred Rituals, have become routine and listless. Yes, they receive the sacraments regularly… but… God seems…. far away. It often appears to them as though there is another type of believer,
- One who is alive in the Spirit,
- One who sees the hand of God in all things,
- One who is guided by God in all that they do
- One who experiences the power and love of God in a deep life of prayer.
But the feeling is that they are not this type of person because……. they feel more like a spiritual orphan. They….may be you. I have definitely at times in my life – been ‘they’. See if any of these descriptions fit you, or have at one time:
- I feel listless in my prayer life; even though I rarely miss a Sunday it is a struggle to go to mass; although I was close to God once I now feel that God is far away;
- I try to pray regularly but nowadays I experience many distractions;
- I am often envious of other Catholics who seem to find faith easy;
- I feel sad and anxious that I may be falling away from the faith I once loved so much.
- I just don’t know what I believe anymore, or if I even still DO believe…
There is a name for this phenomenon: it is called…. The dark night of the soul. And you may have heard of this term before. It generally implies that those who experience it are in some way advanced on their personal spiritual journey. But it can and does happen to us all. Saint and sinner. Sinner and Saint. St. Teresa of Avila, the great mystical teacher is often quoted for saying to God, “No wonder you have so few friends when you treat them so badly.”
Humorous – yes – but this is often what God appears to do. Appears to do. It is as if God has gotten us off to a good start in childhood and then when we reach adulthood God abandons us.
It is said that the other St. Teresa, St. Teresa of the Child Jesus, experienced not a glimmer of light from God once she entered her Carmel in Liseux. Nothing. Nadda. Zilch. Zed. She often prayed for a sign of God’s presence… but never received one. Yet – We consider her to be one of the really great saints. Why?
Because despite this lack of any evidence of God’s love she continued steadfastly to pray constantly and to turn her every action into a prayer. She is regarded as having reached the very heights of spiritual life. As we found out after her death, Saint Teresa of Calcutta also experienced this phenomenon. Obviously this did not stop her either – didn’t even slow her down.
So….Why does the Lord say “I will not leave you orphans” and then appear so distant? I think the answer is put well in the old saying: absence makes the heart grow fonder.
God loves us deeply and God realizes that at a very deep level of our being we love him. God wants to increase and develop the love we have for him. If God were to reveal himself to us too soon, we would not grow, we would not be able to be heroic in expressing our love for God. And so many others benefit from heroic love – especially those who cannot help themselves or are being hurt by others.
God does not leave us at all, of course. God has given us the Spirit, but the Spirit does not dominate our lives, God is there in a very gentle way prompting our actions, keeping us faithful, helping us to hang in there even though God seems so far away.
- God does this so that we can grow in love, so that love can be stretched to its limits.
- God allows these difficulties so that we can overcome them and grow to our full stature in the spiritual life.
- God does it so that there can be no suggestion that we have been forced or coerced, so that it is certain that our love for God is a totally free act. An act of Free Will.
If you experience any of those things I mentioned, like listlessness in prayer, or feeling that God is distant, be reassured. Be reassured that you are living the life of the Spirit and that you are advancing on this journey and that there is light at the end of the tunnel – and it is the light of Christ. The path you are treading is a well-worn one and there are many guides, but the best guide is the one within you, the Holy Spirit poured out on you in the Sacrament of Confirmation. That is why Christ promised the third Person of God, the Holy Spirit,’ Comforter, as he called him. Comfort, in this sense, comes from the old Latin word, ‘fortis’ which means strong – as in fortify. The Comforter is here still to keep us strong and make us able to cope, even through the darkest of nights.
Remember though, the Spirit of God will not gate-crash into our hearts and minds.
He waits to be received. Free Will. Only one person can open the door of your heart and make Him welcome. That person… is you.
Father Ron
